137 Funny Sayings For Golf Balls: Hilarious Personalization Ideas

Looking to show off your sense of humor on the course? Personalized golf balls are the ultimate way.

With most manufacturers, you get 3 lines and up 17 characters per line for a total of 40 spaces on each ball!

You can customize them however YOU want – including my personal favorite: “I’m not sure what happened here but I think it’s adorable.”

List of Funny Golf Ball Markings

  1. I’m not sure what happened here but I think it’s adorable.
  2. If found, please return to “INSERT NAME”
  3. Come on son
  4. This is not your ball
  5. Stealing is a sin.
  6. This ball is broken. Left where found.
  7. Don’t Lose Me!
  8. Retired
  9. Don’t touch my balls
  10. This ball will explode in 3…2…1
  11. It’s in the hole
  12. Win some, lose some. I lost.
  13. Lost my Balls when I got married
  14. Return to sender.
  15. Retired and loving it.
  16. #Winning
  17. NaNaNaNaNa
  18. Save Me
  19. I’m 80.  What’s your excuse?
  20. I’m not lost, I’m hiding from “INSERT NAME”.
  21. No one can resist my Schweddy Balls.
  22. Return to Joe in the bar for a FREE DRINK.
  23. Pick it up.
  24. Stop Touching My Balls.
  25. Show me the money.
  26. I cleaned my balls for this.
  27. You’re lost too!
  28. Fore!!
  29. Dave Austad lost this golf ball.
  30. Playing through!
  31. It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.
  32. Noonan
  33. My wife has the other one
  34. Dustin hit this beauty
  35. NOT a Cinderella story
  36. MIA
  37. AWOL
  38. Just find a hole
  39. Only John Smith’s wife can touch his balls
  40. Yeah, it really went that far.
  41. This ball paid for with other golfers’ money.
  43. My kids’ inheritance spent well
  44. I’m not lost…I’m on a recon mission.
  45. Take me to your leader!
  46. Birdie maker, money taker.
  47. In Soviet Russia, ball hits you!
  48. I hit it too pure.
  49. Give me an 8
  50. You hit it here too?!
  51. Find the Fairway
  52. Bad Motherf$#!er
  53. I’m free let me be.
  54. If found return to your momma
  55. FORE wasn’t enough strokes
  56. Return to pro shop for a free round of golf
  57. Where’s the beer cart
  58. Did anyone get the number of that driver that hit me?
  59. Obviously, you suck too if your over here.
  60. Free golf ball compliments of “INSERT NAME”
  61. I once was lost but now I’m found.
  62. I like big putts and I cannot lie.
  63. Eric hit this ball to far…now it’s yours.
  64. Hit Me
  65. Help!  I can’t swim!
  66. May the course be with you.
  67. Cursed With Bad Luck
  68. Oops…another shank!
  69. Be the ball.
  70. I said Tees, not TREES.
  71. Get your dirt paws off me.
  72. Mulligan…And again, and again and again.
  73. Free Golf Ball
  74. I see a lot of horticulture in your future.
  75. Go ahead, make my day.
  76. That wasn’t supposed to happen.
  77. Oops, I did it again.
  78. W A S H M E
  79. Just broke 70.  That’s a lot of clubs.
  80. Can you help me find the fairway?
  81. Like my dimples?
  82. I didn’t want this ball anyway – you can have it.
  83. That’s how I roll.
  84. Can you handle my balls?
  85. This ball belongs to (un)lucky “INSERT NAME”.
  86. I’m too good for my home.
  87. Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir.  And I NEVER slice.
  88. Left for dead.
  89. Adopt Me
  90. Will you treat me better than my previous owner?
  91. Oh yeah…FORE!
  92. My balls are dimpled.
  93. Mulligan?
  94. Birdie Hunter
  95. I swear I am good.
  96. Call 605-555-5555 for a free lesson!
  97. Eat, Sleep, Golf, Repeat
  98. This was my “practice shot”
  99. I’m lost. Do you know “INSERT NAME”?
  100. If you’re going to play with my balls, you should at least buy me a beer first!
  101. Your hole is my goal.
  102. Yours is 30 yards back.
  103. Kiss my putt.
  104. Please drop in hole.
  105. World’s Greatest Duffer
  106. World’s Greatest Sandbagger
  107. See Ya Ball
  108. Always wash your balls.
  109. Well… this is awkward.
  110. Weapon of grass destruction.
  111. Look out trees…here I come!
  112. My balls stink!
  113. Dear Mr. Cheapo – find your own ball!
  114. You have one ball.  Now you know how Lance Armstrong feels.
  115. Does this Pro V1 look like your Pink Flying Lady?
  116. Hazard Magnet
  117. #YOLO
  118. Swing Hard
  119. Hiding from Mrs. Titleist
  120. Buy balls…Lose balls…Circle of Golf.
  121. You found this because I stink.
  122. SUCK IT!!!!!!
  123. I love to PAR-TEE!
  124. One under today! 1 under a bush.
  125. Smile!  Remember you paid to do this.
  126. Who’s your caddy?
  127. Nice shot.  You’re still away.
  128. Hands off my balls.
  129. Show me the money!
  130. Early to bed, early to rise.  Golf all day and make up lies.
  131. Yell Fore, Shoot 6, Write 5
  132. The golf gods are always watching.
  133. Keep calm and yell fore.
  134. Please let my ball R.I.P.
  135. OB is the place to be!
  136. Hello, friend

Where To Get Personalized Golf Balls

If you’re looking for personalized golf balls, Golf Galaxy is the place to go. They have a wide range of options from top brands like TaylorMade, Titleist, and Top Flite. And they’re extremely well respected in the golf equipment industry. So you can be confident you’re getting the best quality products.

Plus, their customer service is top-notch. So if you have any questions or need help choosing the right product, they’ll be more than happy to assist you. If you’re in the market for personalized golf balls, Golf Galaxy is definitely worth checking out.